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CONCERT, THE

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Greatest strengths are the story line and the tween characters. The dialogue is pretty believable. The setting in Boston is appropriate. It's a cross between Goonies and Oceans 11, with tween heroes and contemporary twists. The kids use their technology to do research and track down the culprits in the story, making it very contemporary. They play detective in an effort to clear their grandfather's good name. 8 of 10 points. The screenplay makes a lot of sense until it comes to a conclusion on page 64 but then circles back to recount the last portion of the story, almost play by play. That does not make sense. We already come to a conclusion and then it's recapped. A bit of that might make sense but not to the degree shown here. Kenzie is the strongest character both as leader of the "band of 5" and the granddaughter of Harry Miller. The other kids are pretty well developed though none stands out as much as Kenzie does. Herne the cop is fairly well developed but the others don't stand out much. Kenzie's wit and good nature are well played and Herne is the brute of her jokes at times. In terms of pro-social modeling, Kenzie exemplifies her love of family in wanting to clear her grandfather's name. She is also a positive role model when dealing with her peers in the "band of 5." Again, it is Kenzie's lead to investigate and solve the mystery of the missing artwork as well as the scholarship funds. She is relentless. The ending is horribly messy. It ends at page 64 and then starts back in again. It's almost as if the writer forgot to delete that version of events. I didn't see any glaring grammar or spelling errors. I do have some issues with mild profanity (Damned, pg. 30) and inappropriate language for youth (I needed that. Was it good for you too.) (wife having an affair with their accountant). Just unnecessary in a script geared for a youth audience. YES - Meets or exceeds the KF criteria, is appealing and engaging. For the most part, I found this screenplay well thought out and well written. I could easily visualize it transformed into a film on the big screen. The characters are engaging and interesting. They storyline is appealing. The shortcomings are some mild profanity, inappropriate language with sexual references and an awkward ending. If those are fixed, I would give it a higher score. As it is now, I give it 3.5 out of 5 stars and accept it for KIDS FIRST!

A group of kids try to prove their grandfathers' innocence of the largest theft of artwork in history. A small budget project that has already won four screenplay competitions last year.